Another Sad Goodbye

It just hit me that he's really leaving. And maybe for good.

I've known this longer than anyone, but it still hurts. I knew this would happen. He told me long time ago. So I don't understand how it just hit me now. And it hit hard. Real hard. Maybe it cuz he's finally telling everyone else. He put it as his status. I guess that makes it more real to me, the fact that he's letting everyone else know now. Saying goodbye. I took one look at it and felt a sharp piercing pain in my chest. Tears started falling, and up to now, I still don't have the energy to stop them...

It seems my life is just full of goodbyes... but this is the first goodbye that's really killing me inside and out. I don't wanna say goodbye yet, it's way too soon... but it looks like I don't have a choice. I wish the ache would stop long enough for me to write more right now, but I can't find the energy to fight the need to just crumple up with my arms around my torn up chest trying to keep my body in one piece and keep crying. So, I'm finished for now.

Now I just have to wait till it's time for him to leave. Guess I have no choice but to wait for another sad goodbye. The saddest goodbye I've ever had to face. I only wish I had the strength to face it with a smile... Oh well... That's my life.

='(